heartache

Well, it's official. My BFF has left DM and is currently on the road to Tennessee. There is no amount of denial (trust me...I know) that can spare the heartache that I feel today. I know what you're thinking..." It's not like this came out of nowhere Bec ". And, you're right, I've known for a while now that this day would come. Only I think that cognitively I knew, but my heart was conveniently left in the dark. It was on a need-to-know basis...and now that she's actually on her way...well, there was no where to hide...the heart found out.

I tried very hard to keep my chin up for her sake. Hoping right along with her that her house would sell already. And I mean really hoping...for honest...for it to sell. What kind of friend would I be to hope for anything different? Who wants her best friend's family to be apart? That's no way to live...Todd missed those boys like crazy, and they missed him...heck, Sarah even missed Todd after a while (hahaha...jk). But, really, I wanted them to be a family again...to quit living in limbo! Even if it meant that I would be without her.

It's a rare gift to have a friend like Sarah. She knows who I am...I mean really knows. And, she likes me anyway (see my quote). She knows my weaknesses. She knows my strengths. She understands why I do the things I do...say the things I say...feel the way I do...because she understands me. Better than anyone I'd say. And it's rare to have a friend like that...it's a blessing to have a friend like that. We have a friendship that will withstand the miles (872.52 miles to be exact). I know cuz we've done it before. But it sucks! It plain sucks!

So, I'm forced to drink my Stella alone (which I am doing right now). While I fight the tears I am afraid to cry...because if I start they will not stop for a good, long time. For now I am hoping that they have a safe trip there. That's all.